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Elizabeth Weintraub
A Weekend at the Crest with Bill Medley and Roger Ebert
Somebody said the other day that the meaning of life was to be with family and friends — oh, wait, it was Bill Medley who brought that up on stage at the Crest Theatre Friday night. The sentiment seemed odd to me, almost self-centered in a way, although everybody in the audience applauded. But then Bill Medley was born 12 years before me, lost his singing partner Bobby Hatfield to a cocaine overdose right before the Righteous Brothers were due to go onstage, and has had an array of experiences completely foreign to my own, so who’s to say; it’s just a different point of view.
I think the meaning of life is to try to leave the world in a little bit better place than when you arrived.
Then, not entirely surprising, my husband and I were at the Crest Theatre this Sunday to watch the premier of Life Itself, a documentary about Roger Ebert, the famous film critic who died last year after a long battle with cancer. People always say that those who survived cancer or didn’t immediately die from it are courageous or brave, is there really valor in choosing life over death? In Ebert’s case, I’m also not sure valiance is a necessary ingredient for pugnaciousness. When his time came to go, he slipped away willingly. It was a beautifully intimate portrait of his life, tears and all.
Both Roger Ebert and Bill Medley were born about the same time, give or take a couple of years. Roger, I should note, also lost his TV partner, Gene Siskel to a brain tumor. Both of these guys lost half of their act and weathered the agony and loss. They both also were no strangers to how laughter can help to pave the way when the road gets rough. My husband was poking fun at Bill Medley as I got ready to go to the show with my girlfriend. He kept singing: I lost my god damn car keys. Medley himself played off perceptions of old age by pretending to pull out his back when going down on his knees. Just wait until my husband gets old. He thinks he’s old now but he’s not.
I have this image of myself as an old lady. And let me insert here that my definition of being an “old lady” changes every year. When was in my teens and hitchhiking across the country, I thought 30 was old. When I turned 45, I thought 60 was old. Now that I qualify for a senior discount at the Crest Theatre, I think 75 is old, maybe 80. But when I’m old lady, I see myself sitting on the front porch of my home in a rocking chair, rocking a rifle in my lap, ready to take aim at the intruders who try to stick me into an “Old Folk’s Home.” Bear in mind I would have to learn how shoot a gun and purchase said firearm, if I intended to really shoot somebody, so it will more likely be a toy rifle I found online at Target, like a rifle Matt Dillon would keep on hand for official marshall duty, but ssshh don’t tell the cops.
Or maybe it would be over eminent domain. They might want to bulldoze my house to put up a casino. I’d sic our cats on ’em, point that rifle and scream: get offa my land. Hey, hey, You, You. No seriously, I will be a force of nature. I hope my husband is around to enjoy it.
Selling a Probate Fixer Home in Sacramento
Not every fixer home in Sacramento much less a probate fixer home is priced in line with the amount a flipper investor wants to pay. Especially not my short sales, for example, because I want them to close. But in any perceived distressed situation, whether it’s a foreclosure, short sale, probate fixers, preforeclosure, what-have-you, investors crawl out of the woodwork looking for a “good deal.” Because it’s all about the spreadsheets to them, and there’s nothing inherently wrong with working with investors who are fueled by the greed of money unless they get in your face about it.
It can be trying at times to maintain composure as a listing agent when investors are swearing, in the literal sense, on the phone that they can buy a home for less in the same damn neighborhood, to which my reply is go ahead then and quit torturing me. Particularly when I am confident there are no other homes for sale at that price. They’ll use whatever tactics they can because it’s their business to buy low and sell high. I get it.
That doesn’t exactly fit well with my business of representing the seller to the best of my ability who wants to obtain the highest price. Therein lies the sticky wicket. I just closed a probate fixer last week that was that kind of sale that generated a ton of calls from investors, all demanding that we slash the price. First, it’s not my call. Second, the seller understands there are two basic types of pricing: that which attracts homeowner occupants who will pay market and that which will attract the flippers.
Perhaps this home is not priced for a flipper investor? But that does not occur to them.
People in general are under the impression that banks give away homes because they ran out of toasters, but it doesn’t work that way. Banks want market value just like regular sellers with equity want market value. It’s a tough market for a flipper. But they are better off finding their own homes to buy than trying to squeeze the integrity out of a Sacramento listing agent.
That probate fixer sale sold at list price. Just like the seller, the executor of the estate, expected. As Is condition, no repairs and all cash.
Closing a Home in South Sacramento for an Elderly Seller
If my mother were alive today, she would be in her early 80s, just like an elderly seller in Sacramento whose home that I, as her listing agent, recently closed. This woman’s son had called from Georgia to ask if I would help his mother to sell her home. His mom is moving across the country as I type to live with him. Her son had done his homework online, reading website after website about real estate agents. He didn’t pick any ol’ Sacramento real estate agent, he entrusted this agent to take care of his mom.
I suspect he chose me in part because I give a crap about other people; I guess it shows, and I have a conscience that follows the Golden Rule. I have an obligation to those I represent, not only as a a REALTOR but as a person.
This elderly seller lived for many decades across from a school in South Sacramento. It’s not the easiest neighborhood in which to sell nor the best location. People get so used to where they live that they don’t always realize that selling real estate depends on the adage: location, location, location. They feel that if they can overlook a train rumbling past the kitchen window, so should every other buyer out there.
Selling a home near a school is no easy feat. I’ve sold 3 of them like this in the past few months. It’s got to be the right combination: an attractive sales price, good condition, exemplary layout. The first buyers who expressed an interest in making an offer were put off by the school, and there was no way they would offer list price. So, we focused instead on the second buyers who appreciated the immaculate condition of the home and its upgrades.
This elderly seller was a bit feisty, sharp as a tack and a supremely delightful person to represent. She was resourceful, and we talked for a while at her kitchen table about her life. It was difficult for her to read the listing paperwork, which I also emailed at her request to her son so he could feel comfortable as well. I showed her patience. Some day I will be that old, and I would like to think that my real estate agent at that time in my life would take a few extra minutes out of her day to be patient with me.
I am honored to have met this woman, this elderly seller. I wish in our country that our American customs showed more respect for elderly people, like they do in other cultures in which the elderly are revered for their wisdom. We should show a little more compassion for our elders. Open doors for them, if you can. Let them move ahead of you in line at the grocery store. Stop your car at pedestrian crossings and wait for them to cross. Small things, simple gestures, are big things.
Another Chase HELOC Short Sale Closes in Spite of Chase Bank
I wrote about a Chase HELOC short sale earlier this spring that was messed up 10 ways from Sunday by Chase, yet due to sheer determination and copious amounts of perspiration, and in spite of the ineptness of Chase’s HELOC short sale department, I got it closed. (I can hear my dead mother in my head whispering: women don’t sweat, we perspire.) In that blog, I described Chase Bank as ambling along “like a fat walrus after a big lunch drooling fish guts down its chin,” and that perspective hasn’t changed one iota.
It’s not like we don’t have enough other distractions as a Sacramento short sale agent that we need to pile more crap on our plate by throwing the completely abysmal methods Chase Bank, as a junior lender, employs on top of it. But you get what you get in Sacramento short sales.
We can’t always choose our dancing partners, and I would not put a short sale seller through more misery by turning down her short sale simply because she has a second mortgage with Chase Bank. That would be ridiculously unfair to the poor seller to be penalized in that manner. But I’m not saying other agents won’t refuse because they might. Especially if they have a lick of sense in their heads, unlike this glutton for punishment of a short sale REALTOR .
When I think back to when this short sale began, I was kicking my toes in the sand at South Beach, strolling along the water’s edge with my husband during our winter vacation last December, when my phone rang. I dug into my cute little Kate Spade wristlet a client gave me as a closing gift and pulled out my phone. Like I said, I’m a glutton for punishment. What other kind of moron would answer her cell on vacation like this?
I assured the caller I could handle her short sale when I got back to Sacramento in January, snatched a pen from my husband whom, as a gritty journalist, I can always count on to carry a pen even while we’re on the beach shooting photos of brightly colored umbrellas with a beach-ball blindingly brilliant blue sky on the horizon, to write down her information.
We closed this short sale this week, 7 months later. But not before we weeded through a lot of difficult buyers and a break-in by thugs that resulted in the theft of all of the built-in appliances, which required additional security methods much to the chagrin of the out-of-area sellers. Even though we sent all of the paperwork to both banks, Wells Fargo gave us turnaround in 4 weeks, but Chase chugged on. Escalations help somewhat but the fact is Chase HELOC seems to remain a Neanderthal when processing a short sale.
Customary Fees for Selling a Home in Sacramento
A sure sign for a Sacramento listing agent that the buyer is “not from around these here parts” is when the buyer’s agent submits an offer that is not in line with customary standards for selling a home in Sacramento. While the seller’s closing costs are not actually etched in stone and they are negotiable, there are still customary ways of splitting costs or paying the fees that parties come to expect.
It’s kinda like how you know if it’s August, it’s time to put up your hair, wear minimum jewelry (because anything metal will burn) and limit your exposure to the sun. Nobody really tells you how to survive our extreme 100+ summer heat, it’s just common sense. Or, alternatively, you just hop in your car and head for the Bay area.
As you’re leaving town, the buyers from the Bay area are heading this direction, pulling their Bay area agents in tow. Our lockbox keys are not yet reciprocal, so it’s often difficult for Bay area agents to show homes in Sacramento, not to mention there is the whole pricing issue and being unfamiliar with neighborhoods that can lead their buyers to overpaying for homes, which is not unusual. Sacramento sellers often pray for a Bay area buyer. Please send me some fool from San Jose, they beg.
If a Bay area buyer would like to downplay the fact that they don’t know the area and their agent may be unfamiliar with customary ways of writing offers in Sacramento, then at the very least there should be a discussion about fees in the purchase contract. It is permissible to pay all of the fees, if the buyer wants, but it’s not always necessary. It is not customary for the seller to pay all of the fees, however.
Your best bet is to call the listing agent and discuss the offer beforehand. When the seller is paying title and escrow, for example, typically the seller chooses the title company in Sacramento. The trend seems to be moving toward sellers and buyers splitting the escrow fee as well, just like the city transfer tax is often paid 50 / 50. But there’s no law that dictates, except for RESPA, and that doesn’t affect fees the sellers pay. For more information, call Elizabeth Weintraub, Sacramento listing agent, Lyon RE, at 916.233.6759.
